Visualization & Ritual for more Self-Compassion

Self-Compassion is one of the keys to self-love.

We don't get to self-love by being hard on ourselves and yet almost every woman I know will tell you they are often hard on themselves. They feel without shaming themselves, they may never get anything done.

I'm here to tell you that shaming yourself only makes you despise what you have to do. Shame makes things much harder. As Brene Brown says "Shame corrodes the very part of us that believes we can change."

Self-compassion is different. By being kind to ourselves, we cheer ourselves on like a coach or a cheerleader. We encourage ourselves, we celebrate, and we're supportive.

We need more self-compassion in the way we speak to ourselves, for our very human limitations, for not being perfect, and all that negative self-talk that happens in our own judgments of ourselves.

Self-compassion doesn't require justifications or explanations. You don't need a reason to be kind to yourself. You deserve it just for showing up to life and all the hard things it entails.

So today, I'm offering a visualization & ritual from the 6-week program, Unlocking Authentic Self-Love to help you bring more self-compassion into your mind, heart & spirit.


Tap into compassion with this short visualization.


We are doing the best our humanness allows until we know better, then the hope is that we do better. This only happens if we take time to connect with this higher self piece of ours. The visualization is great and a physical ritual helps us bring it fully into our dna.


  • Mirror (great if you can sit in front of one, and if you need to stand in the bathroom, do that)
  • Little pieces of paper and a pen (or lipstick or marker and you can write on the mirror)
  • Create a loving atmosphere: make it more special with music, some sweet, loving scents, even treats or your favorite mug of tea or coffee)

Be in front of the mirror. Just look.

It may feel uncomfortable at first, maybe even leaning on painful. See yourself with compassion. See yourself as a friend or loved one.

Take some of those heart-centered breaths we talked about in the visualization. See that cloud of love and light surround you and your reflection, bringing you together in this space. Breath compassion towards your reflection, straight from your heartspace. Feel how your aura of love and compassion embraces this reflection.

You may take several minutes (or as long as you like) to spread this love and compassion on your reflection.

Then write some messages you have for this reflection you’ve been sending love and light to. What are some things you think she needs to know? What are some affirmations you feel in your heart she needs to hear everyday? If you don’t know, what would it be if you did?

Repeat these to yourself for three days at least if possible. Treat yourself well. See if it ‘magically’ shifts anything.

Be gentle with your humanness.




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